Exercise #: 4. Changing POV
Before:
The customization of my burrito from the heavens was a blur. I was so fixated on the thought of finally being able to bite down into the Mexican goodness that lied between the soft, steam pressed tortilla roll. I couldn’t even wait for my friend. I just couldn’t. I had to sit down and try it. The aluminum foil surrounding my delectable treat was like was the gift wrap of a majestic Central American experience. It was Christmas all over again. Feliz Navidad.
After:
#1 (third-person singular)
The customization of his burrito from the heavens was a blur. Oliver was so fixated on the thought of finally being able to bite down into the Mexican goodness that lied between the soft, steam pressed tortilla roll. He couldn’t even wait for my friend. He just couldn’t. He had to sit down and try it. The aluminum foil surrounding his delectable treat was like was the gift wrap of a majestic Central American experience. It was Christmas all over again. Feliz Navidad a él.
The customization of his burrito from the heavens was a blur. Oliver was so fixated on the thought of finally being able to bite down into the Mexican goodness that lied between the soft, steam pressed tortilla roll. He couldn’t even wait for my friend. He just couldn’t. He had to sit down and try it. The aluminum foil surrounding his delectable treat was like was the gift wrap of a majestic Central American experience. It was Christmas all over again. Feliz Navidad a él.
#2 (second person)
The customization of your burrito from the heavens was a blur. You were so fixated on the thought of finally being able to bite down into the Mexican goodness that lied between the soft, steam pressed tortilla roll. You couldn’t even wait for my friend. You just couldn’t. You had to sit down and try it. The aluminum foil surrounding your delectable treat was like was the gift wrap of a majestic Central American experience. It was Christmas all over again. Feliz Navidad para ti.
The customization of your burrito from the heavens was a blur. You were so fixated on the thought of finally being able to bite down into the Mexican goodness that lied between the soft, steam pressed tortilla roll. You couldn’t even wait for my friend. You just couldn’t. You had to sit down and try it. The aluminum foil surrounding your delectable treat was like was the gift wrap of a majestic Central American experience. It was Christmas all over again. Feliz Navidad para ti.
I enjoyed this exercise the most because I felt the different POVs of my paragraph gave very different tones. Although #1 felt a little weird writing, since it was in third-person of myself, I thought it gave off the tone one would hear while watching a show like the Crocodile Hunter, where I was the specimen being researched during my intimate first moment shared with a Chipotle burrito. The tone I felt from #2 is rather accusatory, as if being so obsessed with a burrito was an action to feel guilty about. Either way, I thought these exercises were fun in seeing how different POVs create different voices when writing to an audience.
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